So, it has come to my attention that a certain confederacy of Polytheists has devised a cunning scheme for mid July. Rhyd and Julian apparently want to somehow “get me sober“. I plan to accept this challenge (is it a challenge..?) and win by drinking prolifically throughout the event. However, for this to happen, Rhyd has to be able to make it to New York. With that in mind, I issue a challenge of my own:
I will develop and accept the conditions of a drinking game whose rules and protocols are developed based upon donations made to Rhyd’s “GTFTNY” (getthefucktonewyork) adventure fund. For every $33.33 donation made to Rhyd’s cause, I will take on one drinking-game-parameter (such as “take a drink whenever somebody says Humanist” or “Finish your drink whenever somebody says John Fucking Beckett”). Some levels of feasibility must apply (e.g. I can’t drink out of a giraffe’s skull if I don’t have a giraffe’s skull, etc) and some level of accommodation must be hashed out. Each condition/parameter will be valid for one full day of the conference the donator’s choosing, and somebody (not me) will be keeping track. I sort of feel like there is even a way to turn this into a Bingo game. If anybody donates Rhyd’s full financial needs as a result of this post, I will totally develop a Bingo game to accompany these shenanigans.
What are you waiting for? Donate to Rhyd’s trip, and to the destruction of my liver. It’ll be fucking awesome.